Multitasking through the Multiverse

Walking along High Street near the south campus area of The Ohio State University, Mike recounts a harrowing “walk of shame” in freezing conditions during which his backpack disintegrated and spilled the contents along Parsons Avenue. While struggling to multitask during the broadcast, Mike reflects on how the genre of science-fiction has evolved alongside our actual “future,” including the concept of multiverse theory.

Good morning, this is Mike George coming at you live on this refreshing Tuesday morning, 10 December 2024 in the "non-Oprah universe." It is a beautiful day, which is hard to believe because just over a week ago, I endured a miserable "walk of shame" at 3:00 in -5 degree temperatures and 35 mph winds.

During that walk, my trusty backpack completely disintegrated, and all my belongings fell along Parsons Avenue in the freezing wind. In its absence, WANDA has come to the rescue to pick up the slack.

Lately, WANDA’s speakers have been out of service due to cumulative fuck-ups on my part, Practice makes perfect, but it often requires some collateral damage.

Discovering Pink Floyd

I am 38 years old and have been a stoner for about 17 or 18 of those years, but I only recently discovered the wonderful world of Pink Floyd, specifically the song "Comfortably Numb". I absolutely fell in love with it, but the guitar solos caused me to lose it in terms of elation. Poor WANDA suffered some collateral damage and abuse because I attempted some "over-ambitious and overzealous stunts" while listening to those solos.

Now, Wanda is serving her secondary purpose: carrying about 60 lbs of my gear, which frees my hands so I can enjoy this blueberries and cream pastry. It’s a treat from the St. Sophia Greek Orthodox Church, which is one of my secret gems for free food in Columbus.

Urban & Architectural Design Commentary

I’m currently standing at 9th and High Street. This area, the Southern Campus Gateway, heralded the age of "IKEA-land" architecture taking over Columbus — vaguely European, geometric, and minimalist styles that some might call gaudy, but I’m embracing it as the “future” of our city.

I’m also passing by Popeyes. Last time, I made an hour-long trek home and tragically forgot a large order I had placed on the app. I never reclaimed it, but I hope a worker or someone else got to enjoy that $12 order rather than it being tossed in the trash. Columbus is an incredibly generous city regarding free food and resources from churches and community organizations; the organizational aspect of it is truly impressive.

Measuring & Comparing Fuck-Ups

I’ve developed a rating system for fuck-ups. At the top is a "she-bacle," the greatest and most prolonged level of disaster. Below that is a "cacophony of fuck-ups," which I describe as an ensemble of voices or instruments in complete disarray, like an elementary school marching band of only clarinets. Then you have a "calamity," and finally, a plain old "fuck-up".

I’ve stopped here in front of the North Side Branch of the Columbus Metropolitan Library. They are aggressively expanding and building fine new branches like this one. They play classical orchestral music outside, which I love. I’ve heard they play it to ward off unhoused people, but that logic seems arbitrary and implies that unhoused folks have poor taste in music, which is incorrect.

Possibilities in Sci-Fi

To revisit a topic from my last broadcast: the evolution of Science Fiction. Sci-fi from my childhood felt optimistic, but today’s genre feels more like a "cacophony of fuckups," reflecting a society fracturing into tribalism rather than the globalization of the '90s.

Regarding the Multiverse theory—popularized by films like Doctor Strange and Everything Everywhere All At Once—I don't really buy into it. I think the Multiverse is a convenient writing tool used to cover plot holes. Psychologically, I believe the concept is born from a sense of loss or regret. It’s a coping mechanism for people mourning a major mistake, allowing them to ask, "What if?" or "If only I had done this differently".

In reality, the world is random as fuck. Humans struggle with randomness; we want everything to have a reason or purpose. We tell ourselves that suffering must be for a reason, but sometimes you just suffer, and the universe doesn't care about your setbacks. There is actually something nice about that—zooming out and realizing the world moves on regardless of your individual tragedy.

Causality and Humanity

A viewer, Andrew, commented that the world is impacted by our "shenanigans" through cause and effect. I agree there is a "sweet spot" between causality and pure randomness. However, we aren't as important as we think.

I'm reminded of a George Carlin bit where he suggested humanity’s only reason for existing might have been to create plastic. We might just be a failed mutation or a pesky invasive species. Insects are actually better than us at taking collective action; you don't see ants rebelling or posting on TikTok about how they are right and everyone else is wrong. They function as a cohesive swarm where the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.

(A passerby approaches Mike asking for a pen to write down numbers)

I’ve only got so many brain cells, one second... here, I have a pen. Do you need paper? Take this. That’s my cue to get off here and be a productive member of society. It’s more fun when other people interact; otherwise, it’s boring as fuck.

I managed to finish the topic of Sci-Fi and the Multiverse, which I still believe is a contrived idea from grieving authors rather than a reality of quantum physics. Maybe there’s a parallel universe where I’m correct. Take care of yourselves and take care of somebody else.